Spotted in a toilet of a London office:
’Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.’
In a Laundromat:
’Automatic washing machines. Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.’
In a London department store:
’Bargain Basement upstairs.’
In an office:
’Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday please bring it back or further steps will be taken.’
In an office:
’After tea breaks staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board.'
Outside a secondhand shop:
’We exchange anything – bicycles, washing machines, etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain?’
Notice in health food shop window:
‘Closed due to illness.'
Spotted in a safari park:
’Elephants, please stay in your car.'
Seen during a conference:
‘For anyone who has children and doesn’t know it, there is day care on the first floor.'
Notice in a field:
’The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.’
Message on a leaflet:
’If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons.'
On a repair shop door:
'We can repair anything. (Please knock hard on the door, the bell doesn’t work).’
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